10 stupid smartphone accessories nobody should buy

Step away from the selfie stick.

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It’s tempting to go crazy buying accessories for your new smartphone. I mean, who doesn’t need a Lumee selfie flash phone case?

But just because something exists does not mean you should buy it. Here are 10 ridiculous smartphone accessories you absolutely do not need.

A selfie stick

You think you look stupid taking a selfie? Well, you look about a hundred times stupider taking a selfie with a selfie stick.

A belfie stick

A selfie stick, but for your butt! Need I say more?

A telephoto lens attachment

Don’t get me wrong—lens attachments, like those made by Olloclip, can definitely improve your smartphone photography game. But a smartphone camera can’t replace your DSLR, and this telephoto lens clip just looks stupid.

A hamburger headphone jack screen cleaning charm

Keeping your screen clean is a priority—I get that. But this impressively large 6.5-inch chain of plush hamburgers is not exactly the most stylish way to keep your screen fingerprint-free.

A smartphone-controlled LED dog vest

I have two small dogs, so I can appreciate how difficult it is to keep people from stepping on them in the dark. A glow-in-the-dark collar, or even a harness with a couple of flashing LEDs, makes sense. But a $300 smartphone-controlled vest that flashes colors and text across your dog’s back seems like overkill. Or is that just me?

A breathalyzer

Do you need a breathalyzer attached to your smartphone? Or do you need to reconsider your drinking habits?

A phone headband

I want to believe it’s a joke, but this incredibly cool-looking headband that straps your phone to your ear is available for purchase…

A retro phone handset

You know what’s even more comfortable than a retro phone handset that plugs into your smartphone’s headphone jack? Headphones. Which also plug into your phone’s headphone jack.

A phone thong

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This supposedly protects your phone’s home button.

A gun-shaped phone case

When you put this phone case in your pocket, it looks like you’re carrying a handgun. What could possibly go wrong?!

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