A few weeks ago, I was sitting in a restaurant with a friend I hadn’t seen in ages. We were catching up, when our food came. It looked delicious. I picked up my fork to dig in, when my friend reached out her arm to stop me.
“No!” She practically yelled in my ear. “First, let me Instagram it!”
Excuse me? I was so shocked that I just stared at her as she took 48 photos from different angles before lowering her arm and oh-so-generously allowing me to partake in my now slightly-cold meal. She didn’t start eating, though. First she had to pick the right photo, crop it, add a filter or two, and then come up with a clever quote and a bunch of hashtags.
Needless to say, I think the Instagramming has gone too far! Instagram is fine once in a while, but here are 11 times when you should just say no to the Instagram bug.
When you should be eating
I, personally, am not a #foodporn photographer, but I’m not going to hate on people who are. That said, there needs to be a limit. If you’re physically stopping people from digging into their delicious restaurant food so you can set up the perfect ‘gram-worthy shot, it’s time to dial it down a notch.
When you’re done eating
That picture of your empty bowl doesn’t make people think, “Dang, that food must have been off the charts!” It makes them think, “Gross, why is this person posting pictures of dirty dishes?”
When you’re bleeding
Nobody wants to see your broken ankle or your open wound on Instagram. Nobody. Also, instead of taking pictures, shouldn’t you be calling 911?
When you’re naked
That blurry, low-res photo you took in the dark is not artistic. It’s just…black.
At the gym
The gym is for working out. Not taking pictures. Not gym selfies, not snaps of how much weight you’re leg-pressing, not creepy shots of the hottie in the yoga pants. None of these things.
Um, what? Unless you’re posting a #latergram, it’s not okay to Instagram pics from your boudoir. Please don’t ask me why.
Do you work at Instagram? Are you a social media manager? No and no? Then don’t post photos from your office. Even if your office is really awesome, you’ll just look like you’re humble-bragging.
When you’re driving
Cool, so you’re operating a large, moving vehicle, and you just snapped a photo, uploaded it to Instagram, cropped it, filtered it, and added sixteen hashtags? I feel really safe right now.
When you’re on a plane
Newsflash: All airplane wing photos look exactly the same. Exactly. The. Same.
When you have nothing to post
“Inspiring” quotes are not good Instagram posts. The #tbt photo you took…last week…is not a good Instagram post. 15 selfies in a row...not good Instagram posts. If you have nothing to post, just don’t post!