I used to hate emoticons, emojicons, and emoji. I’m a writer—so my thought was, “if you can’t say it with words, why say it at all?” (Or something like that.) But now that Android has an increasing number of apps that feature pre-set emojicons (text emoji, also kaomoji), emoji characters, and stickers, I’m beginning to see the usefulness of pictures versus text. Especially since our brains apparently process the little images the same way we do facial expressions. There are some messages that just aren’t as effective when they’re written out. For example…
Say what you will about emoticons—the winking smiley face is critical for preemptively diffusing awkward situations ;)
The entire plot of Les Miserables
A picture is worth a thousand words, but there are 560,000 words in Les Miserables. Thankfully, it seems like an emoji is worth far more than a thousand words.
’I AM ANGRY!’
There are plenty of times when you feel nothing but pure RAGE—for example, when your coworker tries to take credit for your brilliant idea for the 28th time—and you just have no words. The only way to truly express this is with the table flip emojicon:
When you want to play Connect Four
What are those dot emojis for, anyway? Why, they’re for playing a rollicking game of Connect Four, that’s what.
Emoticons, emojicons, and emoji are perfect for when you are literally speechless…but you need to convey said speechlessness via text. The O_O emojicon says it all.
LOL. Like, seriously, LOL.
There’s “haha,” and there’s “LOL,” but what about when you’re laughing so hard that you’re literally crying? There’s an emoji for that!
When you need to say anything about poop
Emoji were created in Japan, and Japan has a weird obsession with poop. Not just any poop—cute, anthropomorphized poop. So if you ever need to say anything about poop, whether it’s “Crap!” or “I shouldn’t have eaten that Taco Bell last night,” you must use an emoji.
Sure, you could say “I don’t know,” but it’s better to show your recipient just how clueless you are with this emojicon: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
When you’re trying to flirt
Flirting via text is pretty difficult, because there’s a lot of room for misinterpretation. So why not make things easier on you (and her/him) by lightening up the mood with some kissy-face emoji? After all, according to a study by Match.com, people who use emojis have more sex.
When you’re quoting song lyrics
Why type out the entire song when you can type out only part of the song, and use emoji for the rest? (Also: If you’re typing out song lyrics in the first place, you definitely have enough time on your hands to search for appropriate emoji.)
When you need to shut. it. DOWN.
Nothing says NOPE like a well thought out emoji story.